I Failed

I failed at keeping the promise I know. I failed myself in believing I was going to go through with it. I failed at letting myself think I thought the one person I thought would comfort me just ended up spiting in my fucking face. I should have just told the one person I knew wouldn't fucking make me feel worse about the whole situation. I have this guilt sinking inside of me. I'm an idiot for doing it I know. I'm such a fucking idiot for doing what I did. I still can't believe I did that. I was so fucking scared to be honest. I was so scared of failing. I had only got one hour of sleep. My stomach was in complete pain for me being so scared. IT WAS MY FAULT. I know it was I know what I did. but for fucking sake to make me feel worse about it..... Just fucking bothers me. I hate you for that. You were the ONE fucking person i always turn to... Now I know I can't. I'll stick with the one person that comforted me. Thanx boot for it. I hate this I wish I had gotten my fucking ass up and just done it. But I knew I wasn't going to be able to concentrate...

THIS IS BULLSHIT IM JUST EXCUSE AFTER EXCUSE.. ITS LIKE IM TRYING TO LET YOU KNOW. IM DONE WITH IT. IM DONE WITH WAITING, IM DONE WITH THIS SHIT. IM SO FUCKING PISSED.

FUCK YOU, AND I KNOW FOR SURE YOUR GOING TO RUN YOUR BIG FAT MOUTH TO EVERYONE.


it's like I'm a big joke to everybody.